What If They’re Right?

The Mayans

Tis the season for making promises that more than likely will be broken within a few days or weeks. Yes, I’m talking about the dreaded “New Year’s Resolutions”. In the strip both Dave and Max had to confront the issue as did I and I’m assuming many of you. But last Saturday there was sense of urgency and added significance when it came time to list my “to do’s” for 2012.

Why?

Because it’s 2012 and according to some, we won’t have to worry about 2013!

Yes, the ol’ Mayan calendar comes to an end on December 21st of THIS year!

My pastor recalled a funny joke about the Mayans and their calendar during his sermon last week.

It went something like this…

One Mayan is chiseling the calendar into a stone tablet and says, “I’ve run out of stone!”
The other Mayan says, “Boy, is that going to freak some people out!’

The congregation laughed.

But sadly, there are probably people out there that actually think that our beloved planet Earth will be hit by some rogue planet or a “killer” solar flare or even be subjected to a catastrophic geomagnetic reversal.

What?

You don’t know what geomagnetic reversal is?

Go watch the movie, “2012” and you’ll get your answer! Oh yeah, one of my cable channels just happened to run that very movie over and over and over on New Year’s Day! Guess we better start heading for the secret arks that are no doubt being built as you read this in of all places, China!

What?

You don’t know about the secret arks?

Better watch that movie!

Okay, so I don’t actually believe that the world is coming to end anytime soon, but it did get me thinking, “What if…”

So I put together my list of things I’d better get done before December 21, 2012.

Here we go…

One thing that tops my list is to get a stupid hole in one! I’m always been the bridesmaid or the witness on this one. I’ve come as close as one inch on a couple occasions and had several trickle up to within a foot, but NEVER had one drop into the cup! Heck, I’ve witnessed two by neighbor, “Sparty Pete” and three by own father! By the way…number three of my fathers was with his first swing of club I had just given him for Father’s Day…true story! I resolve to get one before December 21st!

I resolve to lose twenty pounds.
(Don’t we all?)

And if successful with the weight loss, I resolve to run the Fargo Half Marathon in May and the Des Moines Dam To Dam in June.

Why Fargo? Have you been there? It’s FLAT!

Why the Dam To Dam since technically this is not a new resolution since I’ve ran the thing about five times?

Well, this year there are some changes to the route with a finish that will take runners over a pretty cool bridge that crosses the Des Moines River. I resolve to do both.

Speaking of running…

I resolve to run a full marathon after turning the age of 50.

I turn the half century mark on September 6th…looks like an October marathon will be on the calendar!

I resolve to look down upon the world from 13,444 feet one more time! The view from atop Cloud Peak in the Big Horn Mountains of Wyoming in 2010 was breathtaking and my son’s Boy Scout Troop just happens to be heading there again this August…I want to be there!

Speaking of Boy Scout trips…I was fortunate to be able to sail the Florida Keys with my oldest son a couple of years ago. I resolve to have the same memory with my other son. Anchors away in June!

I resolve to mail my sisters birthday card early this year. (Her birthday is December 22)

I resolve to visit Hawaii when it’s warm there and cold here.

I resolve to no longer have to deal with thousands of dry pine needles from a tree that was in my living room!

I resolve not to ever watch Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin again on New Year’s Eve!

I resolve to watch a Pauly Shore movie from start to finish. (If one is not available, the movie “Cabin Boy” will suffice…also, I plan this for sometime AFTER December 21st!)

And finally,I resolve to draw more cartoons in 2012.

So there you have it!

My “To Do List” for the coming year.

Time will only tell if I’ll get the full year to complete everything!

I look at it this way…

If the Mayans are wrong, then I can shove a few of these things into 2013 and beyond and if they’re right, it should be a heck of a show on December 21st!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!


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